While reading this book, I must say that the way Jordan developed the main character, Grace, seemed very realistic to what someone today would describe as obsessive compulsive disorder. While I would argue the author did an excellent job at showing the reader what goes on with a person suffering from obsessive compulsive disorder, the way that she developed the character could have been done in more detail. It was a little difficult in the beginning of the novel to fully understand why she kept counting everything-literally everything. She would count the bristles on a toothbrush to the size of the piece of cake she would in her mouth at breakfast. It also was unclear exactly when this became a problem for Grace and what events in her life caused her to act in this manner. The reader can gather the impression that Grace was an upset and lonely, but there was no explanation of why until later on in the novel. However, this was not done in a significant amount of clarity as I would have liked to have seen. This may cause a problem for some readers because they would prefer a faster paced novel and one that answers the questions going on their mind as they read.
Grace always kept the fact that she counted everything a secret, and she really did not see it as a problem until a man in the grocery store named Ian noticed it because she had taken one of his bananas in order to have an even number of 10. What I specifically found challenging to understand is how Grace could not know that there was a problem and try to get help. It should have became obvious to her she needed help or she needed to tell someone about her problems when she wasn't able to hold her job as a teacher anymore.
Despite some of the issues I had with the development of the character, overall I would say that the novel was very well written. Toni Jordan wrote in a very interesting manner and it was done in a way that was understandable and enjoyable. The narrator for the duration of the story was Grace, which I find interesting because I wonder if the perception the reader sees of Grace would have been different if the narrator was somebody else or even if it changed from Grace to one of her family members. When you read the novel with Grace as the narrator, you get the impression that she is a lonely girl who just wants to fit in the world despite the fact that she has the compulsion to count. However, in my opinion, the reader would probably think of Grace as either annoying or strange if the story was narrated by her sister or Ian.
I found myself taking a long time completing this book because in the beginning it was a difficult for me to get interested because she begins by discussing numbers. However, eventually I was able to get used to her referring to objects that are countable and discussing her daily routine with time. One quote I found interesting was "Most people don't understand that numbers rule, not just the world in a macro way but their world, their own world. Their lives. They don't really understand that everything and everybody are connected my a mathematical formula. Counting is what defines us...the only thing that gives our lives meaning is the knowledge that eventually we all will die. That's what makes each minute important. Without the ability to count our days, our hours, our loved ones...there's no meaning. Our lives would have no meaning. Without counting, our lives are unexamined. Not valued. Not precious. This consciousness, this ability to rejoice when we gain something and grieve when we lose something-this is what separates us from other animals. Counting, adding, measuring, timing. It's what makes us human." When Grace states this it becomes clear that she wants meaning in her life and that she feels that counting gives meaning because it gives her something to get through the day and to look forward to. However, at the end of the novel, Grace's attitude about life changes and is evident when she says "Life isn't when you are standing on top of the mountain looking at the sunset. Life isn't waiting at the altar or the moment your child is born or that time you were swimming in deep water and a dolphin came up alongside you. These are fragments. 10 or 12 grains of sand spread throughout your entire existence. These are not life. Life is brushing your teeth or making a sandwich or watching the news or waiting for the bus. Or walking. Every day, thousands of tiny events happen and if you're not watching, if you're not careful, if you don't capture them and make them count, you could miss it. You could miss your whole life." Now, Grace is beginning to see that she has wasted part of her life with her compulsions and little details of life that she thought she needed to know when really all she needs to enjoy the simplicity of life itself. Curious to know what makes Grace want to change and appreciate her life??
A connection I was able to make with this book was with the television series Monk. How both this novel and Monk are similar is that they both tell a story about the lives of people who have to live with obsessive compulsive disorder, and how other people view their abnormalities. So, for people who are fans of the television show Monk, this book may be for you to read....
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